How Do Kissing Scenes Work?
Writing kissing scenes can be a tricky proposition. They’re often essential parts of stories, yet they also present awkward and stressful situations for writers.
The kissing scene offers writers a chance to advance the plotline, express an intense emotion, create tension, settle miscommunication or simply bring characters closer together.
Intimacy
One of the most challenging parts of writing a kissing scene is trying to convey how it feels inside. It’s easy to get lost in all the physicality, but it’s essential that you also consider how the body’s emotions are being expressed.
Kissing can cause your heart rate to elevate and breathing to become deeper. Every part of your body tingles with greater sensitivity, making every touch feel magnified. Furthermore, you may be more susceptible to goosebumps or chills, altering the dynamic between both of you.
Intimacy is a crucial element of kissing scenes. It conveys how deeply your characters care about one another and allows them to reveal the most sultry, vulnerable side of themselves to one another.
Despite these advantages, kissing scenes can be challenging to write and perform. They require both actors’ and directors’ comfort level as well as an expert balance between coyness and crudeness.
To avoid having a negative experience, work with an intimacy coordinator who will supervise the actor’s interaction with their partner and guarantee they follow Intimacy Directors International guidelines for context, communication, consent, choreography and closure. These guidelines ensure all scenes adhere to these requirements.
Ita O’Brien is an Intimacy Coordinator and Movement Director who specializes in film, TV, and theatre. She conducts workshops on Intimacy and regularly teaches it at top drama schools.
As Intimacy Coordinator, Ita’s mission is to make actors feel comfortable and confident in their roles. She strives to raise the standards for intimate work in theatre, especially when it comes to sex or sexual violence.
She founded the Intimacy Collective, India’s first network of intimacy professionals, to make the industry safer and more respectful for everyone. Furthermore, she strives to give ICs a distinct identity so actors know they’re working with someone who genuinely cares about their safety.
The Intimacy Collective website states that its members are “intentional, dedicated and compassionate individuals who have made a career out of empowering others in the intimacy field.” It provides various resources for audiences such as trainings, articles and videos; you can also learn more about Intimacy Collective by reading its blog.
Actors’ comfortability
Kissing scenes in theater and film are often used by actors to demonstrate their vulnerability. This helps them create a more realistic, authentic, and believable connection between the characters they portray.
However, for some actors who are nervous about physical intimacy or have never done kissing before, this can be a challenge. Fortunately, most actors take an extremely professional approach to kissing scenes and recognize that overcoming any discomfort is part of their job.
Some directors are sympathetic to these concerns and will work with the actors to make them more comfortable. Others might even suggest substituting a physical action that conveys the same sentiment, like giving someone an affectionate hug.
If you have any reservations about a kissing scene, be sure to discuss them with your director prior to shooting. Furthermore, you can rehearse the kiss so that you feel confident and at ease during it by the end.
Before beginning the kiss, make sure your acting partner looks you in the eyes so they understand what qualities you desire in a kiss and how best to position themselves for it.
When starting the kiss, do so slowly and gently. Pull your lips outward slightly as you get closer to your partner’s mouth; this will help create a passionate smooch that lasts longer.
You can add more realism to the kiss by using your tongue, which will help it convey more of the feelings you want to convey. However, be mindful of personal and cultural issues when using your tongue; consult your director before filming if there are any questions or worries about its appropriateness in context of a scene.
Actors sometimes use their tongues when kissing in movies, though it’s up to the actors whether this practice is acceptable. Some find this uncomfortable while others find it an effective technique that amplifies the intensity of the moment.
When required to kiss someone in a movie, it is important to remain professional and focused on your role. Treat the kissing scene like any other acting exercise; make sure it’s done for legitimate reasons rather than trying to gain sexual advantage over your co-star.
Rehearsal
Actors often perform intimate scenes, such as kissing, to express a character’s emotional state. Before shooting the scene, actors and actresses usually discuss their comfort levels with one another and with the director or intimacy coordinator to ensure they have everything needed for an enjoyable performance.
Rehearsing a kiss can be intimidating for some actors, especially those who have never done it before. Fortunately, the rehearsal process is usually fairly straightforward and there are numerous ways you can prepare for this type of performance.
1. Understand the Story
When performing a kissing scene, it’s essential to comprehend its dramatic significance. For instance, if you’re playing a young couple who have endured much together, an intimate rain-soaked kiss can be the ideal symbol of their devotion and affection for one another.
2. Consider Your Boundaries
If you have a medical condition such as cold sores that could make kissing uncomfortable, then it may be best to opt out of this type of scene work in class. Your teacher should be supportive of your needs, and there may be other ways of telling a story without involving kissing altogether.
3. Practice a Stage Kiss
One of the best ways to prepare for a stage kiss is to do it alone first, so that you become comfortable with it before inviting your partner onto set. Doing this allows for practicing in a quieter environment which might reduce anxiety levels.
4. Be honest about Your Preferences
If kissing is something you feel uncomfortable doing, it’s perfectly acceptable to let your teachers know. They might assign another scene or find another way in class to convey the same emotion and tone without involving a kiss.
5. Use a modified placeholder
In the past, actors who felt uneasy about kissing would mark their mouthing with either a high five or other gesture that was safe and consensual. Afterward, they’d drop that placeholder once they were ready to initiate contact.
Filming
Filmmakers often struggle with how best to capture an intimate moment between characters while making it look natural onscreen. Here’s our guide for creating realistic kissing scenes onscreen.
One way to achieve this effect is with visual effects. This technique allows the scene to appear more convincing without investing extra time or resources into filming it.
For instance, Jonah Hill and Lauren London’s kissing scenes in You People were created using CGI technology, creating the illusion that they are actually making physical contact onscreen. It’s an unusual technique but could indicate Hollywood is getting more creative when depicting sex onscreen.
Another example is the hit soap opera “Neighbours.” This show chronicles the passionate relationships among residents of Ramsay Street and, like many other soaps filmed during the pandemic, producers weren’t willing to forbid kissing scenes.
It was a tricky situation, since the crew needed to adhere to COVID-19 protocols and get lead characters quarantined before they could lock lips on screen. But they found ways around this by having real-life couples join them for kissing scenes on set.
When creating a kissing scene on set, it is essential to have an objective in mind. Don’t just focus on the actual kiss; consider all of its components: tension between actors before they lock lips, psychology of the kiss, and audience reactions afterwards.
Additionally, it’s essential to know your boundaries. If a particular kissing technique or pose makes you uncomfortable, let your castmate know before the scene is filmed so they can avoid it if possible.
Finally, be sure to practice the kiss before filming it so you don’t feel awkward on set. Additionally, discussing your emotions with the director beforehand can help them comprehend what qualities you expect in a scene.
It’s essential to remember that kissing is an organic part of life and most actors find themselves comfortable with it. Even if they don’t, actors still need to act professionally and perform the scene exactly as directed by their director.
- How to Do a Spider-Man Kiss Upside Down
Kirsten Dunst recently revealed that, almost two decades later, Peter Parker and Mary Jane Watson’s iconic kiss from Sam Raimi’s Spider-Man remains an unforgettable romance classic despite it not actually being very romantic to film. Emma Stone and Andrew Garfield recreated their signature upside-down kiss from their own franchise in an entertaining SNL skit. Check it out below. 1. Pull down the maskFew movie kisses have made history like Kirsten Dunst’s memorable scene from Spider-Man 2 where she kisses Peter Parker’s webslinger upside down after thanking him for saving her from muggers in an alleyway – marking his transition into manhood for good. It remains one of cinematic history’s iconic scenes and one that signifies his first kiss as an adult man. Tobey Maguire shared his memories from filming an upside-down makeout session during its 20th anniversary home release commentary, recalling how water got in his nose and made breathing difficult; but was pleased that such a scene has since become iconic cinema. Recreate the Spiderman Kiss at Home You can achieve a similar result at home by finding a firm surface to support your weight, such as a bed, couch or tree trunk. When placing something soft underneath, be sure to leave enough cushion so as to not damage any furniture if it should tip over unexpectedly. In addition, make sure there’s some way for you to hang upside-down without becoming dizzy and disoriented – then find a way to hang upside-down without becoming dizzy or disoriented! 2. Turn on the rainSpider-Man: Far From Home features some unforgettable scenes, but my personal favorite is Peter Parker and Mary Jane Watson’s iconic upside down kiss scene from 2002 Sam Raimi film Spider-Man: Far From Home. After saving her from some bad guys in an alleyway, Peter Parker planted a passionate kiss on Mary Jane Watson after saving her. However, filming this romantic moment wasn’t quite so romantic – Tobey Maguire revealed during an interview with Variety that the shoot was extremely uncomfortable as rainwater got into Tobey Maguire’s nose meaning he couldn’t breathe properly out his mouth; in fact it’s incredible that Tobey could finish filming any scenes at all. Dunst recently discussed the legacy of her kiss, which has inspired imitations on various talk and game shows (Dawn French and Bear Grylls attempted it on The Graham Norton Show in 2014). Perhaps Tom Holland and Zendaya can recreate this scene in Spider-Man: No Way Home? I certainly hope so. 3. Hold each other upside downOne of the most memorable scenes from Spider-Man films was when Peter Parker suspended upside-down and kissed Mary Jane Watson (Kirsten Dunst). This scene became so beloved, it even made its way onto TikTok! Scene 2 takes place after Tobey Maguire as Spider-Man (Tobey Maguire) successfully subdued a group of muggers, then planted a kiss on Mary Jane as thanks for helping get out of tight spot. Danny Elfman provides soothing music in this breathtaking sequence which includes Peter and Mary Jane engaging in romantic make-out session – making for one romantic and dramatic film moment! Sam Raimi’s Spider-Man movies may not have the most heartwarming endings, yet one scene still makes us swoon. Kirsten Dunst recently discussed it, saying she wasn’t aware that the scene would become so iconic and felt tremendous pressure to live up to it. Additionally, she commented on its difficulty when recreating it later. 4. Let goHanging upside-down can be both thrilling and dangerous, particularly if you suffer from health conditions like heart disease, high blood pressure or glaucoma. Before trying this stunt, make sure that there is someone available who can hold your feet securely to prevent falls; also consult your physician if any chronic health conditions exist prior to undertaking such an attempt. Sam Raimi’s Spider-Man features an iconic moment between Peter Parker (Tobey Maguire) and MJ (Kirsten Dunst). After defeating four muggers, Spider-Man reappears next to MJ while upside-down and covered in rainwater in an alleyway nearby – an image which captures both romance and iconicity in equal measure. Miles and Gwen came close to recreating this scene in Across the Spider-Verse, though it wasn’t exactly identical. Still, they get credit for trying so hard.
[…] - How Do Lions Kiss?
Lions are magnificent animals with strong bodies that rank second only to tigers in size. Known for their loud roars that can be heard up to five miles away, lions hunt in packs using teamwork to take down prey that are larger and faster than them. Video footage showing a young girl kissing a lion at a zoo has gone viral, yet its significance lies deeper. The lesson this video imparts on viewers about dealing with wild animals should not be misconstrued as superficial entertainment alone. Lions are omnivoresLions are carnivores, yet they do consume some plant matter – most often from undigested stomach contents of prey animals they hunt. Furthermore, 10-50% of their diet comes from scavenging. Lions utilize licking and nuzzling as a way to strengthen social bonds among their pride members, similar to primate allogrooming behavior. A male will lick other males as part of an attempt to establish their rank and status within their pride. This bonding behavior helps establish male rank amongst themselves similar to allogrooming among primates. Lions are notoriously hungry creatures; they hunt animals even if they’re not hungry to satisfy their gluttonous natures and can consume up to 15% of their bodyweight at one sitting! When feasting on juicy prey like zebras or gazelles, other animals may arrive unexpectedly and distract the lion so as to take away its prize meal. They hunt by stalkingLions typically hunt by stalking prey until it comes close enough for an attack. As they don’t possess enough energy for long pursuits, lions rely on stalking and short bursts of speed in order to bring down prey. Their long tail serves as communication during group hunts. Video footage of a young girl kissing a lion at a zoo has gone viral, yet it’s important to remember that even friendly-appearing wild animals should not be approached directly. Lions live complex social lives composed of groups called prides. Each pride comprises two to twenty related females and their offspring, one male, and sometimes coalitions with other males to take over territory or prevent competing males from taking control over the population. Pride members may kill cubs of other prides to maintain dominance. They swimWhile lions don’t tend to like water much, they do possess an ability to swim. Lions using shallow waters for hunting prey may use them sneak up before pouncing and using swimming as travel mode to reach their destinations faster. Lions in warmer climates typically seek refuge in bodies of water such as rivers in order to cool themselves off more effectively. However, lions do not traditionally swim as a form of socializing. Instead, they engage in behaviors similar to grooming among primates – such as licking each other. Furthermore, rubbing their heads against one another seems like another form of communication and may serve the same function as nuzzling in humans. Lions may not be as adept swimmers as tigers, yet they still reach speeds up to 11 mph and travel great distances; these traits make lions considered faster than humans. They are social animalsLions are social animals that tend to form groups called prides that consist of related females and their offspring along with one or more resident males. Females typically remain with their mother’s pride while males leave to form coalitions in order to conquer new territories. Researchers discovered that, despite an apparent hierarchy, lions interact in ways which seem affectionate – head rubbing and licking are among them – similar to allogrooming among primates, helping establish, maintain, and strengthen relationships among them. African lion tamer Moataz Marwan recently went viral after posting a viral video featuring him stroking and kissing a large lion, which has amassed over 468,700 views on TikTok and won praise from animal rights supporters and animal lovers. Unfortunately, however, the footage may put its subject more vulnerable to attacks by rival males or even trophy hunters who could kill it outright. They are dangerousLions can be very dangerous animals and should never be approached directly. If a lion approaches, try clapping your hands, shouting loudly, waving your arms wildly and waving your arms back and forth to make yourself appear bigger and dissuade it from charging at you. If driving, keep moving so as to evade being attacked by one. The roar is used to communicate within prides, signal strength, and dissuade potential rivals. It can reach up to 114 decibels and be heard up to five miles away; the darker its mane indicates an older and stronger individual lion. Lions groom each other to maintain and strengthen social bonds, grooming each other by licking each other’s heads and necks; males typically dominate this practice. When grooming occurs this way, this behavior may also include more obvious signals, such as growling or snarling from both parties involved.
[…] - How to Go For a Kiss
An incredible kiss not only provides physical and emotional satisfaction, it can also trigger physiological processes which increase immunity and contribute to keeping our bodies looking their best. If your date indicates they’re ready for a kiss, feel free to initiate one – but remember that their comfort level must always come first and respect any boundaries set. 1. Look into her eyes.Eye contact is key in setting the scene for a great kiss, displaying both confidence and an intention of going for what one wants. If a woman looks directly into your eyes and keeps licking or looking down at her lips, this could be a telltale sign she wants you to kiss her. She could be signaling to you her attraction to your dynamic and desire for sexual submission from both of you. Make sure your sense of smell plays an active part when leaning in for a kiss, too. A light lotion or hint of perfume are great ways to leave an inviting and long-lasting scent on her skin; and ensure your breath smells fresh – bad breath can be highly off-putting! 2. Move in.Some people are very open to kissing almost immediately upon meeting a new person (think bar/club). If this is what works for you, make the move immediately but ensure it takes place in an appropriate venue. An effective way to segue into locking lips is through gentle teasing, such as gently stroking her cheek or forehead – this shows interest without appearing creepy or needy. If it feels right, try kissing her neck or earlobe too – this sensual move is both romantic and intimate, making a great show-stopper move during a make-out session! Additionally, fresh breath helps the situation so bringing along mints can also come in handy! 3. Lean in.Leaning in for a kiss on your first date can be tricky. To prevent bumping heads or tripping over things, lean in towards your partner at eye level – which could require lowering your chair or sitting on the floor, depending on her height – or go up onto tiptoes if she’s taller. Flirting can be an excellent way to ease into leaning in, but physical cues can also help. Touching them on the knee or shoulder, placing one hand behind their head or holding their back can all increase intimacy and make them more likely to let you kiss them. You could also offer some well-timed compliments but don’t go too fast or they might become overwhelmed. 4. Be vulnerable.Kissing is an intimate act and can help deepen your relationship. However, it’s essential to respect her boundaries and understand when she may not yet be ready to move forward with things. An affectionate forehead kiss from parents and grandparents to their children conveys care, affection, and protectiveness while at the same time can be romantic between two people. A neck kiss may feel like an innocent gesture or it could turn sensual during make-out sessions with your partner. And don’t forget the “butterfly kiss.” To create the illusion that they are being kissed by butterflies, flutter your lips against their eyes or face in order to give an effect similar to being caressed by butterflies – making her feel both comfortable and loved in an adorable flirting move! 5. Smell her breath.An unpleasant-smelling mouth is one of the biggest kissing turnoffs, so if you want a trip to Makeout Town, keep your breath fresh! Avoid overbrushing your lips or applying too much lip gloss; she wants to feel your soft lips against hers. Also, when on public transportation or other environments which do not permit full-on kisses (for example when riding in cars or other similar contexts) be respectful of her response (for instance if she says no or does not wish to make out immediately). With these tips hopefully in hand you’ll build up to an unforgettable kissing moment; otherwise there are always other ways of showing love! Happy Kissing!
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